Albert/Voice-Overs
< Albert
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Albert's voice actor is Bradley Gareth.
Parallel Event System (PES) guys come with full voice acting for free when obtained and are not locked behind paid DLC, but they do not come with partially voiced dialogue like the Main 12 and Phone Flings.
Voiceover List
[edit source]| ID | Category | Relationship | Voiceline Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Talk | Adversary |
I've managed to keep this whole owl business a secret so far, but I have a class to run later! *sigh* My students are going to think this is an absolute hoot...
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| 2 | Talk | Adversary |
If I seem overly calm for someone hoo has undergone such a drastic transformation, it's only because the end of term is looming and I can only flap in panic about one thing at a time.
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| 3 | Talk | Adversary |
I coughed up my first pellet this morning - cafeteria food. Between you and me, I may have preferred bits of vole...
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| 4 | Talk | Adversary |
Why yes, I am wearing glasses. Even as a bloody bird of prey with binocular night-vision, I'm somehow still nearsighted... Unbelievable...
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| 5 | Talk | Adversary |
To think, I've read the works of history's greatest philosophers. Aristotle. Kant. Yankovic. And yet none of those brainiacs wrote a single thing that could help me understand this.
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| 6 | Talk | Acquaintance to Frenemy |
Well, I just had my first class since "the incident". My students walked into the hall, saw me at the lectern, and turned to leave! I had to remind them I'm a highly educated owl, thank you very much!
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| 7 | Talk | Acquaintance to Frenemy |
It's not all bad. I don't need a ladder anymore to reach all those books gathering dust at the top of the library stacks. Now, as for turning the pages without my talons tearing them to shreds...
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| 8 | Talk | Acquaintance to Frenemy |
I used to love teaching Plato's Allegory of the Cave. Now whenever I bring it up I just get peckish thinking about all the rodents probably hiding out down there...
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| 9 | Talk | Acquaintance to Frenemy |
Talk about an identity crisis! When strangers assume I'm brilliant, how am I to know, now, whether it's because I'm a professor, or an owl? Of course, whether or not they're correct in either case, I couldn't say...
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| 10 | Talk | Acquaintance to Frenemy |
I most certainly do not deliver letters to my students! Even fuddy duddy old professors like me know how to operate the e-mail!
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| 11 | Talk | Friendzone |
If we accept the premise that what separates humans from animals is our foreknowledge of our own eventual deaths, then it stands to reason that I am still human, beak and feathers be damned!
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| 12 | Talk | Friendzone |
Really, I ought to be rather less concerned with the 'how' and the 'why' of my transformation than I am with how it fits into the greater study of Philosophy. I hoot, therefore I am?
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| 13 | Talk | Friendzone |
So. Read any good... treatises or dialectics, lately? Sorry, I'm a cracking lecturer, but it would seem I'm slightly rusty when it comes to making conversation with people I... want to like me.
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| 14 | Talk | Friendzone |
It's small potatoes, but do you know what perplexes me? The fact that I'm able to make recognizable speech sounds. It goes against everything we know about language - I don't even have lips, for pity's sake!
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| 15 | Talk | Friendzone |
I'd consult with a certain colleague of mine to see if there's a scientific explanation for this, but we're not on speaking terms after I told her string theory sounds more like Philosophy than Physics.
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| 16 | Talk | Friendzone |
So I said, "Nietzsche? I'll tell you owl about him!" ...Ah, that's quite all right, nobody in the lecture hall laughed, either.
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| 17 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
I must admit, the wings are certainly striking to look at - and handy for dusting, to boot! But having all my jackets altered has been no small expense on a professor's salary, even with tenure!
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| 18 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
A student told me to "Look on the bright side, at least with all those feathers you always have a quill handy!" How old does he think I am? I use a fountain pen, thank you very much!
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| 19 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
I must be growing awfully familiar with you; I have the urge to remove my jacket and loosen my tie. You better watch out - before too long I'll be rolling up my shirtsleeves!
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| 20 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
I hear you're acquainted with a couple of my pupils. If you're hoping to secure them a better grade, start by teaching them the importance of attendance. Class cutting makes me grind my beak - er, teeth.
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| 21 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
You've got a rather disarming smile. Has anyone ever told you that? Oh, what am I saying - of course you must hear it all the time...
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| 22 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
One might call me the Plato to your Socrates. After all, I do find myself hanging on to every word you say.
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| 23 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
I was just reading the most wonderful passage, and it caused me to think of you. Are you by chance familiar with Kierkegaard's Works of Love? If not, I'd be pleased to give you a private lesson.
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| 24 | Talk | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart |
You know? That's enough textbook reading for today. Let's go for fish and chips! I can always read the newspaper it's wrapped in if I start to miss squinting at tiny text.
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| 25 | Talk | Boyfriend to Lover |
You know, I looked at you just now and completely forgot what I was going to say? How very silly of me...
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| 26 | Talk | Boyfriend to Lover |
Can I tell you something a bit pathetic? Promise not to laugh? I've been hoping for rain so I could offer to share my umbrella with you. But since the clouds won't cooperate, how about a parasol?
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| 27 | Talk | Boyfriend to Lover |
Am I an owl that dreamed I was a man? Or a man that dreamed I was an owl? Well, at least so long as you're here, it's a good dream.
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| 28 | Talk | Boyfriend to Lover |
Can I admit to a little insecurity of mine? I'm worried you think I'm looming... but I actually just want to be around you! It's not my fault my owlish features make my actions seem... ominous.
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| 29 | Talk | Boyfriend to Lover |
I really must insist you sit in on one of my classes. Not because I want to show off - although, that too... Mostly I'm dying to hear your take on the course material!
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| 30 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
You little stinker... Don't think I didn't notice that mischievous twinkle in your eye. What are you up to now, eh? If you want something from me, you need only ask...
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| 31 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
Will you rub my temples? These essays are giving me a headache, but I need my pen-hand free to keep up the pace on my marking. Assuming I want to get to bed on time and avoid waking up as an owl...
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| 32 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
I don't care if it's corny... I'm saying it. I may not be an owl any longer, but so long as I'm with you, I'll always feel as though my heart has wings: free and unfettered and wild.
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| 33 | Pop-up | Adversary |
Professor Albert Darcy, at your service. I'm the head of the Philosophy department here at STF University. Please, Mr. Darcy was my father.
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| 34 | Pop-up | Acquaintance |
Hoo - ahem. How do you do?
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| 35 | Pop-up | Frenemy |
Don't you dare walk in here and say you've come to "donate to my museum". I've heard that joke ten times already this week, and I still don't get it!
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| 36 | Pop-up | Friendzone |
You certainly are a sight for sore eyes. Literally - I'm really not built for daylight anymore...
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| 37 | Pop-up | Awkward Besties |
Oh, hello! Care to come in for a cuppa? I must warn you, though, it's herbal. No more caffeine for this night owl, I'm afraid!
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| 38 | Pop-up | Crush |
Now see here! How's a chap supposed to get any reading done while you're around? You're altogether too distracting; I really must protest. Hold on, that doesn't mean I want you to leave!
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| 39 | Pop-up | Sweetheart |
How lovely of you to stop by. And just when I was about to succumb to boredom. Tell me, do you know any good philosophy puns? Just to perk me up, mind you. I'm not planning on stealing your material.
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| 40 | Pop-up | Boyfriend |
I need some fresh air. Have you ever been read poetry in a rowboat by a British academic? Yes, I realize Kant is more my usual fare, but I do dabble in the occasional dirty limerick! Interested?
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| 41 | Pop-up | Lover |
Well, well, well. Look who's come around. Give us a kiss, won't you?
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| 42 | Tickle | Adversary to Friendzone (Bad) |
Hoo! Watch yourself, now! I nearly gave you a nip of the beak!
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| 43 | Tickle | Awkward Besties to Sweetheart (Good) |
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single professor in possession of a fine head of feathers, must be in want of a preening partner.
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| 44 | Tickle | Boyfriend to Lover (Sexy) |
You saucy thing... I'd tell you to behave, but I'm enjoying your naughty hands too much!
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| 45 | Gift | Adversary (Doesn't Like) |
Well, it's... better than the things I've been coughing up, I suppose...
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| 46 | Gift | Acquaintance to Friendzone (Likes) |
I'm sure I can find a place for this in my office, um, somewhere... Although... I may have to do a bit of decluttering, first...
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| 47 | Gift | Awkward Besties (Normal) |
Did you pick this up for me when you last went round the shops? How thoughtful! Though, you really needn't have brought me anything...
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| 48 | Gift | Crush to Sweetheart (Loves It) |
Cor blimey! How did you know to get me this? I think I rather underestimate how perceptive you are. Well no more! To that end... would you care to proofread this paper I'm writing?
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| 49 | Gift | Boyfriend to Lover - Normal |
Clever clogs. Now you're just showing off. I'll allow it.
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| 50 | Gift | Lover+ (Endless) - (Super loves it) |
Why, it's positively splendid! You're positively splendid!
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| 60 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Acquaintance |
You know, students are always giving me cockamamie sob stories about why they need extensions, and in the interest of preserving my time and sanity, I rarely deviate from my go-to answer...
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| 61 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Acquaintance |
...Which happens to be "I don't give a hoot about your excuses". You don't think this is all some cosmic punishment as opposed to a random fluke of nature, do you? Of course not. It can't be.
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| 62 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Frenemy |
I must admit, I'm hideously embarrassed. Not about being turned into an owl, and all that my new animal nature... entails...
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| 63 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Frenemy |
I'm embarrassed that I spent at least five minutes trying to pick up my favorite marking pen before finally realizing this isn't a cartoon and thus my wingtip feathers do not work as fingers do...
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| 64 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Friendzone |
It's curious. Speaking to your social circle, I've learned that how we all became animals varies in ways bordering on random, but the sort of animal somehow always reflects our individual nature.
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| 65 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Friendzone |
Take me: a professor turned into a wise owl. It's too perfect, too poetic... Almost as if it were by design. But whose design? A question with seismic implications, to be sure...
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| 66 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Awkward Besties |
Well, I may not have gotten any closer to understanding the precise cause or even the broader philosophical significance of my predicament, but you really mustn't think it's through any fault of yours.
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| 67 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Awkward Besties |
You've been an exemplary research partner and a steadfast friend. Thank you. Thank you.
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| 68 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Crush |
I'm relieved I still have all my hair. The stress was making me molt, and I was worried when I regained human form, I'd have a receding hairline! ...I do still have all my hair, yes? Be honest.
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| 69 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Crush |
Thanks for the reassurance. Philosophers may be preoccupied with such lofty matters as the meaning of life, but that doesn't mean I don't have space in my cluttered mind to care about my appearance!
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| 70 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Sweetheart |
I don't know what it is about you, but you awaken my mind and my senses to an utterly unprecedented degree. Why, I hardly need my daily three cups of tea anymore!
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| 71 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Sweetheart |
I feel like I should be using your... abilities to get through some of the more boring, long-winded tomes on my shelves... But to be honest, I'd rather do something FUN together! Any ideas?
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| 72 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Boyfriend |
Lately I've been overcome with this vague unsettled feeling. I thought it might be the constant hunger of the wild predator, so far removed from our sated human existence we no longer recognize it.
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| 73 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Boyfriend |
But maybe it's just boring old worry that once my little problem's done and dusted, our relationship will be too. So if I may be so bold... have you considered sticking around just for the hell of it?
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| 74 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Lover |
According to Aristophanes, human beings all used to be round, two-faced, four-legged critters. Then Zeus split us all in two, leaving us forever wounded, searching for our "other halves".
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| 75 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Lover |
Which I thought was a rather silly, simplistic way of understanding love... until I met you. Not sure I'd jump straight to the human beach ball thing, but you really do make me feel whole, somehow.
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| 76 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Max Lover |
The term "platonic love" actually comes from the "platonic ideal" - which refers to anything that's in its purest, truest form - and Plato's belief that non-romantic love is the purest form of love.
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| 77 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Max Lover |
But who died and put Plato in charge of feelings? Because from where I'm standing, the love I share with you is the truest form of love, and it is very romantic! And involves snogging! So there.
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| 78 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
So I've been thinking... Alright, that's a poor choice of words - I'm always thinking - some would say OVERthinking - but I digress. What was I talking about again? Never mind. Nice, um... butt?
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| 79 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
How do you feel about brisk walks? I like to take one every afternoon so I can publicly mutter to myself like a misunderstood genius. Having you along might spoil the effect, but you're worth it.
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| 80 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
So what do YOU think the meaning of life is? I'm being serious! You live yours so authentically, and so full of love... You must have a perspective worth sharing!
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| 81 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
You may not know this, but I am a force to be reckoned with at the campus pub quiz nights! ...Just so long as nobody asks me questions involving maths.
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| 82 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
I'm pleased to inform you we've reached the point in our relationship where I am willing to loan you my books. In fact, I may just love you enough to forgive you if you return them dog-eared!
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| 83 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
Oh... Oh dear... Would you look at that... It seems a few of those tricky little buttons have come undone on my shirt... How scandalous! What's next, showing wrist?
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| 84 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
People think academics are sun-starved, feeble little pencil-necks, but have you seen the size of the hardcover books I lug around? Exactly. Go on, feel my biceps!
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| 85 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
You never fail to utterly fascinate me. How can my feelings for you be so simple and straightforward when you are so layered and multifaceted?
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| 86 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
"I think, therefore I am?" How about, "I love, therefore I am yours"?
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| 87 | Talk | Lover+ (Endless) |
The best philosophers may cause me to think, to question, to ponder... But you're the one who makes me laugh. I rather think that makes you the greatest mind of all.
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| 88 | Tickle | Lover+ (Endless) |
Oh-ho-ho-ho! S-stop it! This is undignified! I have tenure! Ohoho!
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| 89 | Tickle | Lover+ (Endless) |
Cheeky! Careful now, or I'll be forced to pin you against the nearest flat surface!
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| 90 | Tickle | Lover+ (Endless) |
Away, away! I'm trying to concentrate! Oh, very well. I guess Sartre won't mind, seeing as he's dead and all. But you better make this distraction worthwhile. Go on, do your worst!
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| 91 | Gift | Lover+ (Endless) |
You're joking. You didn't! I can't believe - But how?! I'm flabbergasted - nay, flummoxed! What a treat!
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| 92 | Gift | Lover+ (Endless) |
You're so sweet, I should cut you up and smother you in a trifle. ...Sorry. That sounded less violent in my head.
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| 93 | Gift | Lover+ (Endless) |
You're quite the little show-off, aren't you? That's all right, I happen to rather like an apple polisher from time to time. And you're a particularly fetching one.
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| 94 | Pop-up | Lover+ (Endless) |
Oh good, you're here. I was hoping you'd be game to lay your head in my lap while I read to you and perhaps play with your hair?
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| 95 | Pop-up | Lover+ (Endless) |
Just who I needed to see, right when I needed to see them most. I've been lecturing on nihilism all afternoon and I could really use a laugh. Or a hug. Or a fortifying cup of tea. Okay, all three.
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| 96 | Pop-up | Lover+ (Endless) |
I'm so glad I'm not an owl anymore. Seeing you brightens my day, a talent which would be wasted on a nocturnal creature!
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| 97 | Pop-up | Lover+ (Endless) |
I'm so glad I'm not an owl anymore. Seeing you brightens my day, a talent which would be wasted on a nocturnal creature!
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| 98 | Pop-up | Lover+ (Endless) |
Oh! Here I was thinking my romantic feelings for you were making my vision hazy, when the whole time I just needed to clean my glasses! Frankly, I'm relieved. I'd much rather get a good look at you.
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| 116 | Level Up 1 | Upgrade to Lover+ (Endless) |
I need to tell you something... slightly unethical. You see, I've been using you as part of some ongoing philosophical research without your knowledge...
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| 117 | Level Up 2 | Upgrade to Lover+ (Endless) |
The subject of that research being, "Can the love between soulmates still deepen over time?" So far, the answer is a resounding "Yes!"
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Date Dialogue
[edit source]| ID | Category | Relationship | Voiceline Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 51 | Date | Boat Ride Date (Animal) |
Ha! I always joked that first year undergrads have a tendency to "imprint" on me... But now I've got first-hand experience teaching baby ducks, t'would seem I wasn't even exaggerating in saying so!
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| 52 | Date | Boat Ride Date (Hybrid/Human) |
I do apologize for bringing marking along on our date, though I must confess it made the task less tedious. The philosopher Poppins was right - a spoonful of sugar does make the medicine go down!
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| 53 | Date | Coaster Date (Animal) |
I've been an absolutely abysmal date, haven't I? It's nothing to do with you, I swear. It's this blasted nocturnal sleep schedule! Here, I'll prove it - let's try that roller coaster again after sunset!
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| 54 | Date | Coaster Date (Hybrid/Human) |
Well, that settles it. I'm not as young as I used to be... even if you do make me feel young. I suppose at least I only lost my tea, and not my lunch.
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| 55 | Date | Carnival Date (Animal) |
E-excuse me. That excursion appears to have ruffled my feathers, er, somewhat. Do you mind stroking me - very gently! - to smooth them back down? Ahhh... I feel - I mean that feels - much better...
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| 56 | Date | Carnival Date (Hybrid/Human) |
I wasn't scared, I was thinking! That ride reminded me that not even the wisest of us knows when or how their life will end. Rather romantic, then, that I chose to spend that time with you...
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| 57 | Date | Dinner Date (Animal) |
I do so hate to be a bother, which is why I didn't say anything to the waiter at the time... But I did SAY "rat" - and not "ratatouille" - when we ordered, did I not? And my enunciation was clear?
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| 58 | Date | Dinner Date (Hybrid/Human) |
Ta for the treat, luv. You must have had to pull some strings to have high tea served at a filet mignon and foie gras establishment like this.
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| 59 | Date | Masquerade (Human) |
Very well, you got me. I try not to advertise the fact because it's just so... embarrassingly stereotypical, but I am indeed a total Austen fanboy. You could say I had a "ball" on that date! Ohoho!
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Outfit Dialogue
[edit source]| ID | Category | Relationship | Voiceline Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 118 | Gift | Outfit - Boxers |
Forgive me, I took my sock garters off already. I should have asked you if you'd rather I left them on...
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| 125 | Gift | Outfit - Halloween |
How do you do, fellow undergrads? Did I say it right?
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| 126 | Gift | Outfit - Butler |
This is going to be great hands-on research for my thesis on the philosophy of service careers!
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| 140 | Gift | Outfit - Kigurumi |
Aha! I finally understand why so many of my students come to lecture hall in their bedclothes. I'm just so comfy wumfy!
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| 141 | Gift | Outfit - Masquerade |
When you think about it, there may never be a moment where we don't wear one mask or another... Figuratively, anyway.
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| 142 | Gift | Outfit - Summer |
I'm not much of a golfer, to be honest, but this outfit is still a hole in one! Heh heh...
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| 143 | Gift | Outfit - RPG |
My intelligence and wisdom are in tip top shape, so if you need an insight check I'm your man. Just please don't hit me with a fireball, because I will cry.
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| 144 | Gift | Outfit - Kimono |
This scroll? Well, I'm happy for people to assume it's philosophical writings by noted Japanese scholar Kitaro Nishida, but no... it's a list of date night ideas for us. Do you want to hear a few?
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| 146 | Gift | Outfit - Pirate |
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral... I am the very model of a modern Major-General! ...Sorry, did I earworm you?
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Relationship Event Dialogue
[edit source]| ID | Category | Relationship | Voiceline Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| StoryIntro1 | Event Pop-up | Story Intro 1 |
"Honk...hoooot... Honk...hoooot..."
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| StoryIntro2 | Event Pop-up | Story Intro 2 |
"Hooooo... WHO?! Hoo! I beg your pardon! Is it office hours already? I must have dozed off at some point..."
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| StoryIntro3 | Event Pop-up | Story Intro 3 |
"Let me guess: your most pressing question is no longer about the reading. Well, t'would seem I stayed up too late marking... and literally became a night owl! Alas, essays don't grade themselves!"
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| (1) Friendship | Event Pop-up | Upgrade to Frenemy |
"You're jolly good company. Thanks for getting me out of my stuffy office so I can 'spread my wings,' as the saying goes."
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| (2) Kiss | Event Pop-up | Upgrade to Awkward Besties |
"Do you... That is... Do you mind terribly if I... I was wondering how that would feel. Oh!"
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| (3) Human Transform | Event Pop-up | Upgrade to Lover |
"I realize that's terribly cliché, but it's true. And, frankly, if baring my heart's truth is cliché, then-"
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| (4) Love | Event Pop-up | Upgrade to Lover |
"Use this as a bookmark in your favorite book... or make it your mobile phone background or whatever it is you young people do. Just so long as you think of me as often as I think of you!" - XX, Albert
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Dialogue about Cole
[edit source]| ID | Category | Relationship | Voiceline Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 119 | Pop-up Response | About Cole |
Who IS that young man always looming in the back of my lectures? I'm usually flattered when unregistered students sit in just for the opportunity to hear me speak but all he does is glower!
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| 120 | Pop-up Response | About Cole |
Someone dumped a crate of tea bags into my bathtub! Of course, I'm offended by such a hideous waste of tea... But where does one even get a wooden crate of anything in this day and age?
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| 121 | Pop-up Response | About Cole |
I've been receiving disturbing mail of late. Several unmarked envelopes each containing a single fragment of broken fine china... And what's worse they're all from royal family commemorative sets!
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| 122 | Pop-up Response | About Cole |
I'm bloody furious! Some cretin broke into my office and rearranged all my marble busts so they're no longer in chronological order. One doesn't simply put the Descartes before the Hippos!
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| 123 | Pop-up Response | About Cole |
Yes, I've seen the anonymous note on my office door. No, I most certainly don't "use student essays to build my nest." How could I? They submit them electronically! And besides, Great Horned Owls don't make nests, they steal them! Harrumph!
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| 124 | Pop-up Response | About Cole |
The campus library said I can't take out any more books until I pay off thousands in fines! Turns out someone has been using my card for months and not returning anything! Who would DO such a thing?!
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